Ácidos populares

Hoy niños voy a hablaros de las distintas clases de ácidos que existen. A petición popular claro... estoy harto de recibir emails "thessoro, habla de los ácidos". Pues ya está coño, que impaciencia.
Vamos a clasificarlos en dos tipos: populares e impopulares. No me lo acabo de inventar, el propio Louis Pasteur después de descubrir el famoso proceso de pasteurización (fue una suerte que tuviera su mismo nombre) ya los clasificó así. Por cierto, y hablando de pasteurización, es una idea absolutamente genial, se trata de calentar el líquido para eliminar las bacterias que pudieran contener...Pero claro para eso necesitábamos una sofisticada tecnología y tuvieron que pasar medio millón de años para que, desde las primeras hogueras, pudiéramos comprender los complejos mecanismos del fuego y pasteurizar las cosas. No fue hasta el siglo XIX cuando Pasteur dio la campanada.
Yo iba a hablar de los ácidos. Por un lado como decía, los populares. Son como los jueces estrella de la audiencia nacional, pero en ácidos (o sea con un humor sarcástico).
Ahí están el ácido acetilsalicílico, el ácido fólico, el ácido péptico... Son los ácidos amigos.
Por otro lado están los impopulares:
El cancerígeno ácido cítrico, el ácido de las baterías, el ácido sulfúrico, el ácido del alien de Alien. Que claro, diréis, que putada de ácido ¿os acordáis? El que cayó en el suelo de la nave y empezó a atravesar pisos y pisos hacia abajo; pero no!, era un ácido cojonudo oiga, de lo mejorcito que tenían en el set de decorados.

Y claro poneros en su situación (imagináos por un momento que un alien desparrama su ácido en vuestro parquet), ¿Cómo coño paramos el ácido? ¿Y si el ácido hubiera seguido atravesando pisos hasta llegar a la base de la nave? Pues muy fácil oye, coge un cacho de la piel del alien, ¿Acaso la piel del alien se veía afectada? Y la pones donde va cayendo el ácido, como si fuese un cubo pa las goteras, y ya está. Que claro, mucha nave de la hostia, y mucho apellido sofisticado, pero luego pensar lo justito, lo justito para pasar el día y apretar todos esos botoncitos inútiles.  A Sigourney le pusieron una tragaperras, que es muy aficionada al juego, y luego editaron por ordenador la imagen,  y sustituyeron la tragaperras por el panel de la nave, y quedó muy bien, Sigourney estaba súper concentrada para no perder su calderilla.
Quizá continúe porque ahora me tengo que ir a tomar unos ácidos.


Comentarios:

Tronfi el 9/7/2005 - 10:45

Uf, por fín despues de 5 emails, hablas sobre los ácidos. Un gran artículo, sí señor.

rucito el 11/7/2005 - 05:53

¿Y qué me dices del ácido desoxiribonucleico?. Es que el mundo de los ácidos es ese gran desconocido. Gracias por abrirnos los ojos e iluminarnos con tanta ciencia.

Alex (alexisduran at wakeup dot cl) el 6/11/2006 - 19:48

Sería ud. tan gentil de explicarme ¿Qué es el ácido péptico?. Se le agradece de antemano.

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